Monday Jones, A Dominant BDSM Shamanatrix, Sex Goddess & Worker, Holistic Somatic Practitoner, Coach, & the Culture of Sexuality, Sexual Health, & Society

Ep 342: Monday Jones, A Dominant BDSM Shamanatrix, Sex Goddess & Worker, Holistic Somatic Practitioner, Coach, Writer, & the Culture of Sexuality, Sexual Health, & Society. Today on the podcast, you will find an amazing, inspiring, enlightening, and intense discussion with the epic and alternative lifestyle living individual, Monday Jones. We chatted about politics and sex, religion, culture, sex, sexuality, gender, the history of/current environment of sexuality, and sexual health.

More than just a sex-worker; Ms. Monday Jones (aka Artemis Simon). This cheeky Mistress has openly lived a queer, kinky, taboo, unconventional lifestyle in the realm of BDSM and non-monogamy before having words for it. Monday has a lifetime of experience, knowledge and education in the world of holistic techniques that she has developed into her own style of somatic therapy. She blends bodywork, Reiki, Sexology, lifestyle coaching, plant medicine, tantric, holistic hip & pelvic care, talk therapy, fitness, psychic empathy and Female lead BDSM as a Somatic Practitioner & Shamanatrix.

Monday expresses her esoteric craft not only through her somatic practice but also in an artistic medium as an adult entertainer and producer. Owning her own production company; Hard Point has given an outlet to publicly share her photography, short films, written erotica, and host events as a public performer. Monday has willingly provided specialized counsel to the community with one to one and group settings, offering hands-on and virtual sessions and/or teachings as a professional for over the last 12 years.

Ms. Monday Jones is truly a modern day renaissance woman and talented light & shadow worker that does not ignore the element of sex and utilizes it as a tool for ultimate transformation.

We also chatted about her work in a brothel in Nevada, her dating blog, and how our prudish society not only shapes and harms us, but denies that sexual health is a part of mental health. She talked about how first experiences with sex impact and create triggers in our sexuality, then our culture teaches us to ignore it. But our body keeps the score, but also, our nervous systems can be rewired. She helps people do that rewiring as a coach. Website: https://www.MondayJones.com Members Only Site: www.HardPointsbyMonday.com www.mondayjones.com/my-links

Twitter @MsMondayJones IG @MondayJones420 Artemis Simon: www.stargaiaawakening.com

RUAN'S most recent BOOKS/AUDIOBOOKS:
Neighborhood Sex Secrets:
(affiliate links, podcast may receive a small commission on sales):
https://books.ruanwillowauthor.com/neighborhoodsexsecrets
NEW RELEASE AUDIOBOOK! Sharing His Adventurous Wife: First Time Wife Share (Itty-Bitty Vixen) https://books.ruanwillowauthor.com/sharinghisadventurouswifefirsttimewifeshareittybittyvixen

Transcript

Season 3, Episode 342: This transcript was created by Spotify. It is not 100% accurate. If you have questions, please email ruanwillow@gmail.com Thank  you!


0:07
Hello, This is Ruan Willow with the oh Fuck Yeah With Ruin Willow podcast.
Welcome to my podcast, where sexuality is the topic always, whether I'm spinning a tale of erotica or talking to a guest about sex and sexuality.
0:23
Today my guest is Monday Jones, who is more than just a sex worker.
Miss Monday Jones AKA Artemis Simon.
Oh and by the way, under 18 it is time to leave the podcast.
Can't forget that part.
This cheeky mistress has openly lived a queer, kinky, taboo, unconventional lifestyle in the realm of BDSM and non monogamy before having words for it.
0:49
Monday has a lifetime of experience, knowledge and education in the world of holistic techniques that she has developed into her own style of somatic therapy.
She blends body work.
I don't know how to say this one, Reiki.
I think that's how you say it.
Reiki Sexology, lifestyle coaching, plant medicine, Tantric, holistic hip and pelvic care, talk therapy, fitness, psychic empathy, and female lead BDSM as a somatic practitioner.
1:18
And Shama Natrix Monday expresses her esoteric craft not only through her somatic practice, but also in an artistic medium.
As an adult entertainer and producer, owning her own company, Hardpoint has given an outlet to publicly share her photography, short films, written erotica and host events.
1:36
As a public performer, Monday has willingly provided specialized counsel to the community.
With one to one and group settings offering hands on and virtual sessions and or teachings as a professional for over the last 12 years, Miss Monday Jones is truly a modern day renaissance woman and talented light and shadow worker that does not ignore the element of sex and utilizes it as a tool for ultimate transformation.
2:01
Her website is www.mondayjones.com.
She has a members only site hard points by monday.com and she's got all of her links are at mondayjones.com back slash my Dash links on Twitter.
2:17
She has Miss Monday Jones and on IG Instagram she's Monday Jones 4:20 and she also has star oh gosh, I'm going to have to spell this one Star gaiaawakening.com STARGAIAAWAKENING, OK And all of those will be done on the podcast show notes.
2:39
We had a great and interesting chat.
We talked about sexuality and gender and you know, just it was a really interesting conversation.
And our next conversation that we have we have planned is we're going to talk more into the sexuality and nitty gritties of all that delicious stuff of of sex and whatnot.
2:56
So this is a really interesting conversation.
We delved into a lot of different areas and it was just, it was enlightening, it was interesting, it was intriguing.
So stay tuned to find out more about this person.
This very very interesting person.
Don't forget I am an ambassador for Manscaped where you can get 20% off plus free shipping if you use my promo code Ruin Willow 20.
3:20
And also I am an ambassador for Kiru sex toys.
These links will be all down in the podcast show notes, but you can get 10% off from them for Ruin Willow 10 promo code.
And they have amazing sex toys for men and for women.
I love my pearls from them, they're really strong.
3:37
They hold a lot of power and they have amazing sex toys for men too.
So.
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So that's a very sexy thing.
So if you want those, check them out.
And as always, my links on the podcast show notes for my books and audiobooks.
3:54
I have a new audiobook out written by Lacey Cross that I narrated with in my hands audio who is a male voiceover and it's a hot wife book.
Oh, it was so fun and narrate.
It is called sharing his Adventurous Wife, First time wife share itty bitty vixen.
4:11
So I play Jessica and the narrator and in my hands audio plays my husband and also the visitor, the one who joins in.
So it's very sexy.
It's the first book in the series so there will be more to come, so check that out.
4:27
I'll put that link down.
The podcast show notes.
It was so fun and narrate.
I really enjoyed it.
It was super fun.
OK, let's get into the meaty juiciness of this podcast episode.
Let's meet Monday Jones.
OK, let's go.
4:43
Hello everyone.
I'm really excited to talk to this person today.
She's very, very intriguing.
She has so many things that she's done and so it's really fascinating and I'm really excited to hear what she has to say.
I want to welcome Monday Jones to the podcast.
Welcome.
Hi, thank you for having me.
5:01
I'm so interested to talk with you because you have so many things like, you know, of course I checked you out online before prepping this and I just you'd have so many things that you do.
It's really quite amazing.
We've give us like a little tiny snippet of what you do and who you are and but just interesting, something interesting about you that you'd like to say.
5:19
Sure, I'm Monday Jones and I go by the coveted title Shaman Matrix, and I'm a somatic practitioner.
That has also intertwined.
Or maybe I shouldn't say intertwined.
5:35
Maybe I should say I'm not ignoring the sexual component of the somatic practice with the mind, body and spirit, which also does get.
Ignored right, it's.
Yeah, especially in this, especially in American culture.
I mean, I shouldn't say just American culture, but yeah, definitely here in America we're suppressed and in that area and we have.
6:00
A lot of maybe religious impact on it too.
Oh, for sure.
I talk about that a lot on the podcast with guests, and it's just really, really sad where we are, where we are, I think.
I think we're just in this terrible state.
Yes, I agree with you.
6:18
I mean we used to have, we used to have temples before, before religion story of Jesus came out.
So I mean temples, I mean even.
The Temple of Artemis is one of the Seven Wonders of the world, and that temple was all for sexuality and somatic practice.
6:39
I mean, like you could go there and experience it on every level and spectrum of intimacy in this temple.
It's so crazy and like now it's like the clit doesn't even appear in like medical books, like it doesn't exist.
6:56
I think it's funny part, you know, like it's a bad.
Right.
And still.
And yeah.
And still other countries like are removing it from bodies.
How?
Yes, they'll just give me the chills even bringing that up.
But yeah, like, yes, it's mortifying and and where where it once was and and how it's developed to this current day.
7:20
And I do hope to see a pendulum swing to maybe not where it once was, because we can never really go back.
And why do we want to go back?
We've already learned so much to go back.
So, but to a modern day of of at least decriminalizing sex work and stop grouping it with sex trafficking and human trafficking.
7:40
Exactly.
And and allowing it to be a place where an outlet for people to go and explore, especially if they're not able to get it, if they're they're single or they're not able to get it in the current relationship or or don't you know, this is also a service like we don't need to have, Yeah, we we're just still sitting in this crude modern day.
8:02
We are, and we have a huge denial that sexual health impacts mental health like people.
Don't even like white.
Like, they don't even deny that they're even connected, and that is like absolutely asinine and mind blowing that they even would even project such a thing.
8:20
You know, Like it's it's like considered separate somehow.
Yeah, we'll be back after a quick break.
Hey, you get your beard ready.
Hi.
Ready for time with her or him?
8:37
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8:56
Oh fuck yeah.
Yeah, I miss you on that.
I think something in my studies around around sexual health and trauma and well-being something new that just came to my table and I'm not sure if if you know this already, but it was it was mind blowing for me.
9:20
When it was shared with me was that a lot of our first experiences with with sex happens very young children and usually happens.
With people we know and family members and then we don't talk about it.
9:38
I I want to say the number is somewhere in the mid 80% tile and I'm talking like family members of people we know like the neighbor boy, show me mine, show me yours.
That sort of stuff that can like you know you know as as our young brain, the innocent brain gets exposed to that.
9:59
Our adult brain doesn't always.
It doesn't always get translated.
Very well to the adult brain.
And then it gets stored in the body.
And that's a lot of the work that I'm doing as a thematic practitioner as I'm trying to all of those components to rewire it.
And one of the reasons why I went through this study to get to figure out, like, why is this?
10:19
Why is this that a lot of the people that are coming to me are sharing with me that the first experiences are with their cousins or a molestation from their father or a church member or the neighbor.
And I'm just like, Oh my gosh.
OK, I need to dive deeper on this.
10:34
I need to do some research too to figure out what is what is the statistics out there, why is this coming up and how can I help them help them rewire it as I rewire my own as well.
Right, right.
Yeah.
I I have talked to a few people too.
10:51
It's one thing I've always thought of it as, and I don't know if this is accurate or not, but the things that happened to us when we're younger, it's kind of like Pavlov's dog.
You know that story.
You know what I'm saying?
Like something happens to you and it's like this trigger.
And you know, it's not like it's it's not like you want it, but it and it exists and impacts your sexuality your entire life.
11:14
Oh yeah.
Oh yeah.
I just giggled so hard about that because I just had that happen to me this last week.
Did you?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, So, so I work, I work in Nevada.
One of the the brothels there.
And so they have certain doorbells that they ring to let you know if it's a line up or if there's a gentleman or if there's a a customer in the parlor.
11:42
So there's all these bells.
And I I I had when I when I left there, it was kind of traumatic.
There was a family emergency going on too.
It wasn't just like my experience at the brothel.
It was just some stuff was going on.
And I was starting to get triggered though, like the last like 2 days that I was there, I was like, Oh my gosh, I just need to get home to my family emergency.
12:02
I need to not be working.
I'm not even in it.
And every time the doorbell would ring, I would get panicked because I was like, I'm not even on my game.
I can't show up to that lineup.
I don't even want to do this right now.
My stomach hurts.
What the fuck?
Wouldn't have diarrhea?
Not me.
So, so last week I got home.
12:20
I got home to my family emergency.
But the last few days that I was there, it was really triggering me.
Every time I'd hear the doorbell I bet.
And last week I'm home.
Everything smooth.
The family emergency smoothed out and I heard the doorbell and I panicked.
The other day it was on.
It was like some and I was at the doctor's office when it happened.
12:38
So I'm like and it was their phone.
The phone made the same sound that the brothel doorbell makes.
Wow, right?
I feel like our experiences, our sex experiences when we're younger are sort of like that, You know what I mean?
And, like, got it?
Yeah.
Riggered like that.
12:54
And it's just like out of the blue nowhere.
And it's like, where is that coming from?
And it's, I don't know if it comes to our Yum brains, our such sponges, I'm not really sure.
But it's.
I'm not.
I'm not.
Totally sure either.
You know, I've been trying to research that as well, like how, you know, are my my sexual experiences when I was.
13:14
You know, a young child or the the exposures that I had as a young child through, let's say movies or I don't believe I ever walked in on my parents.
But you know, an exposure to that or an exposure to a porn being conversation or porn being left behind in the VCR.
13:34
That was my day.
You know, or just even the exposures of like I show you mine, you know, show me yours, those things even.
As simple as that.
Simple as that.
Like, I I mean, I I'm still trying to figure out if that's the reason why I'm in, the work that I am today, the sex work that I am doing today.
13:56
Or is it that I'm just a really good sex worker?
I'm just really good at this.
Yeah.
So I don't know.
Yeah.
And I don't know.
People come to me with their wild, crazy kinks too, and they want me to tell them a concrete answer.
14:14
Is this kink formulated because of this?
And I I don't think that we've gotten there yet with decoding that and having this concrete answer, yes or no, but.
What you and I have both agreed on here and a lot of other people have too, is that our body keeps the score and yes, whether we want it to or not.
14:41
And we are trainable.
Our nervous system is trainable and we can rewire it.
So there is a way from going from that that traumatized, you know, that like I was saying that doorbell that I had last week, the phone rang like a doorbell.
14:58
I can rewire that.
And I can give that, you know, I did have some very There was gratitude in that experience at the brothel.
It wasn't all traumatic.
It's just the last couple days was hard for me.
Yeah, it's going to go to a.
15:15
Doctor recently, and she was saying that they've actually done some some studies where they've actually tried to erase someone's memory and that was harmful.
You don't want to erase it.
You more want to, like you said, rewire it or redirect.
It.
Or, you know, somehow change it or even potentially use it like for instance.
15:35
If you have a.
Kink that you all something that happened to you that you want to think of in a different way and turn into something positive.
Positive for you to do that, Yeah.
Yep, Yes.
And I did come across a study around.
15:54
Rewiring of the brain and using mindfulness and psychology, Western psychology and how they and they actually took multiple patients.
I don't remember what the total number was, but they took over 100 patients and they put them through this mindfulness with a psychiatrist and they did MRI of their brain before the study and then all the way through the study and they actually watched.
16:23
Brain do the work through this through this technique and and then they took a a picture of it 18 months I think it was an 18 month program and how much the brain had changed and how these people had also walked in with things like PTFD depression general anxiety just just nervous system deregulations in their nervous system basically because their brain that's what's attached to our brain and and it's part of what rule rules our meat suit.
16:53
So there's other bits and pieces as well.
The gut also very much rules the brain, and it's going to play a role in our nervous system too.
So they took these very like very hard, heavy cases for the study and watched like people that were dealing with suicide go from not wanting to live to full on wanting to live and embracing their lives so differently.
17:18
A lot of dedication and a lot of work.
Not a lot of people are taught how to do that kind of work, to do the introspection, how to, how to even just be, because a lot of the mindfulness is just being.
There is actually no doing in that process, right?
Yeah, but I have.
17:38
So I after I saw that study is when I really started pushing a lot of my thematic work around that and around helping.
Those people reshape and also doing it like me, knowing that I'm a somatic practicer, I was like, oh, I need to find a talk therapist that does my mindfulness as well, so that right?
17:55
I'm getting more components here so.
Absolutely.
And so, yeah, when you call yourself a shaman matrix, do you?
Do you, how does that akin to like, say, a dominatrix?
Like what are the differences between you and A?
Dominatrix.
The way just a difference of.
18:13
Dominance or what's?
What would you describe?
As a difference.
So I'm so I'm coming in as a shaman first and then I'm leading it as a as a female lead.
So dominatrix is like a female, a female lead in the BDSM culture atop the dominant person and dynamic.
18:32
And what I basically I shouldn't say what I did.
I.
By MyHeritage and my community, I got recognized as a shaman and then I was already living a lifestyle in the BDSM world as I was living the lifestyle as the dominant already.
18:49
And then I just, I went through my own journey and stuff.
Exploration as well, because that's what a lot of it was, to to build experience, to put the pro in front of it, so to make it a career choice.
19:04
So I moved it from lifestyle to career choice.
Interesting.
But yeah, yeah, somebody, somebody titled me with the shaman.
There's a whole ceremony around it, and then I just put the Atrix right behind it.
Yeah, so I'm approaching.
19:20
It's like I'm doing the somatic practice.
Like I said at the beginning here, I'm doing a somatic practice and I'm not ignoring the sex component.
Sex is the second chakra in our lineup.
It's a lot of countries call it I think you chi life force.
Life comes from there.
19:36
It's where creativity happens.
We make humans there and then we just and then we ignore it.
Why are we ignoring this?
No, no, no.
We need to.
No, we need to own this space and have accountability for it to learn how to yeah, and learn how to use that energy to align us everywhere.
19:59
It's just so amazing to me how many, especially women, do not understand their own sexuality.
They don't understand their bodies.
Some of them don't even understand how to climax.
Yeah.
Well, I'll, I'll vouch that a lot of men don't either because that's 99%.
I mean I shouldn't say 99%, but about 85% of my client are men and they're coming with me the same stuff.
20:19
So we can just say that just humans are out of touch When, yes, that's.
A good way to put it, yeah.
And and like, and I'm not saying like, you're saying that women don't know how to climax.
I'm not saying that men don't know how to climax.
They don't.
They're coming to me with issues around how to control it though.
20:37
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, I bet.
Yeah.
How?
How to?
Yeah.
And I'm also dealing, I will say, with a lot of men these days.
I'm dealing with younger men, EDA lot more than my older men.
Which is crazy.
You don't expect that, Yeah, yeah.
But they're coming.
20:52
They're coming with porn addictions.
They're coming with their own trauma around it, or hypersexualize.
They hypersexualize themselves and they're constant, like constant masturbation.
OK.
Yeah.
So yeah, it's a wide spectrum, but there's definitely like men that I'm dealing with that in in the age group probably around 21 to 35 that with Ed and.
21:16
What's what's so sad, which I hate to see, is that we're just like creating these medications to fix it.
And like, no, that's like a Band-Aid.
That's that's not need to fix why it's actually happening not, oh, let's just medicate this person and that fixes it, You know, like, yeah, I do.
21:34
I do.
I'm happy for medication in some regards to still give.
Yeah, still give to give that.
I mean, they even have like the penile pumps now.
Have you seen that vitamin tends?
They could get like that implant and then they can pump up their own penis, which I think is great like that.
21:51
They have all these things.
So yeah, there's a place for all of it.
But yeah, Western Medicine is definitely going to give you a Band-Aid fix.
And the Band-Aid fix for them is a prescription.
And if you went and talked to your, your naturopath Dr., which they're MD's as well, you went and told them that you're dealing with issues around your libido and dealing with like, issues around your sex drive and your, your being able to get to achieve an orgasm.
22:22
Even that conversation can happen with, like, I would have that conversation with my medical or my holistic Dr. for sure.
But they're going to talk to you about herbs and diet and exercise.
And again, like, that's a lot of work and a lot of people don't want to do that work, so they reach reach for it.
22:40
Yeah.
But instead of doing the, the the exercises around it or even diving deeper and seeing if there is some trauma that stored there.
And I'm not always, again, like not talking about such trauma that it's horrifying, but little trauma, little trauma to our nervous system.
22:58
Accumulate the big trauma in there.
Oh yeah, so you're going to?
Make a mountain.
You know, like that, yes.
Yep.
Yeah, exactly.
So I mean those those.
Some people might not even think of them as traumas at all, but their bodies is reading it as a deregulation.
23:16
Like we're derailed here.
Fix this.
Align me.
Align me.
Quit ignoring, ignoring this.
But you know, anxiety comes up too, I'm sure, and wanting to be perfect or show up for their spouse or or show you know these things too.
23:31
The people pleasing and being a human in relationships isn't easy to begin with.
And then trying to talk to your partner about sex or dating.
Dating beyond just hookups, actually, where like you know, feelings get started accumulating, that's even hard work too.
23:51
I mean, I'm listening to my 22 year old right now about her, you know, with her relationships.
Sure.
And yeah, having to listen to her and her how hard it is.
And she doesn't talk to me about so much about the sex part, even though she knows that's a lot of the therapy works that I do, right.
24:08
But she she knows that she can.
Yeah, yeah, that's good.
That's hard.
That's hard for a lot of people to talk about, especially in our culture.
Even if you grow up that way, they people still know that that's a you know a taboo shub subject right?
Like we were just saying scooting it under the rug.
24:25
It's just a subject all around scooting under the rug.
I I knew at a young age that I was going to have sex and I I didn't.
My parents were hippie dippies and we only saw we only saw basically holistic doctors like.
24:44
And I just realized yesterday I was like, holy smokes, the the most consistent Dr. that I started seeing at three years old who's been a chiropractor.
Oh, sure.
OK.
Yeah.
So have not had like Western medicine before.
And I remember demanding at 15 to get a gynecologist appointment so that I can get on birth control.
25:06
And my family did not want to have a talk about that.
Yeah.
Had to demand a, a Western doctor to get on birth control.
And my family was horrified to have to have that conversation with me.
And then I looked at the about the birds and the bees.
It was such a funny conversation, too.
25:24
And of course they pushed abstinence and they pushed It's going to be better if you're in love.
And I'm just like, dude, it's sex.
I'm going to have it.
I want to explore it.
I can't wait.
And I don't want to get pregnant, right.
So yeah, they eventually broke down and got me one, but also came back to them and I told them because I was around the same time I said I told them I go my sex education in school is so horrible that I yes, it still is awful.
25:55
My kids even vouched for that today.
It's still horrible, horrible.
And I can't even believe this is an like something that was given to me over 25 years ago, the education, right.
And it's still that bad.
And I I told them though, I said the sex Ed is awful and I would like to go and get education around this and take courses and I want to go to school and start doing the assemblies around this.
26:20
And I was dedicated to it.
I was like super, like I was pro sex and pro sex health and sex like sex knowledge starting like age 15.
I think I started touring the schools at 16 and talking about it.
Oh wow, And were your parents upset with this or were they accepting?
26:38
They spoke their piece.
But my parents, I think they've realized with me, if I'm adamant about something, I'm going to do it.
And usually when I say I'm going to do something, I do it.
They probably just backed off and finally was like, I'm not going to win with her.
26:57
She's she's already on the course.
I'm surprised she even shared it with us kind of thing.
That's true.
That's it though, that you feel you felt driven ever since I had a wish.
To move in this way in the world, yes.
27:13
And I will tell you, I do have memories of sexual abuse.
I used to boast that I didn't have of it.
And I used to say, gosh, I'm just a sex worker because this is just my past.
Like this is just who I'm supposed to be.
I never, I don't have any sexual trauma in there.
27:29
I don't have there's that's not part of my story.
And then I got a hysterectomy.
And I after my hysterectomy, memory started flooding in.
And I went to my doctor and I said something to him about it.
27:45
I said, have you ever heard of this?
When a body part gets, you know, an organ gets removed that memories come back.
And he said, oh, it's very common because I hear it.
I hear it more more than you'd probably think.
And and I go, well, should I be trusting this?
And he all he said to me was body keeps the score.
28:01
I and just like shook his head.
And I was like, oh gosh, OK.
That's amazing.
Mind blowing.
Yeah.
And yeah, it is mind blowing.
And this is like kind of confirming the conversation around it.
And I can even bring into the loop as well.
28:17
Like with those floods of memory, I started seeing my somatic practitioner and I started rewiring those.
And I realized just like also confirming the conversation too, bringing it back.
And around the loop, I realized a lot of it was just innocent play with kids my age, and that it wasn't.
28:38
It wasn't as traumatizing as a lot of the memories that I've brought up.
I did unravel some some sexual abuse though, from my father and from my brother.
And those I chose not to fully unravel all of those memories, but to continue to do the gratitude work around it so that I can do the full rewiring.
28:59
And I've chosen not to, like, approach either one of them for accountability.
Yeah, yeah.
I just thought that was my personal choice.
But it was definitely like eye opening, eye opening, going down that journey and realizing that a lot of it wasn't, a lot of it was just innocent clay as kids exploring because that's what animals do.
29:22
I mean, gosh, are you a pet owner or any any of any listener out there, a pet owner?
Have you seen how they play?
A lot of them are humping.
Exactly.
Oh, for sure.
I mean, these are just conspicual things and we're being and it's not.
29:37
And I just had this conversation with a guest recently how how differently we're cultured as children.
Like, you know, in our culture.
Oh, the, oh, the boy's in the shower.
The young boy's in the shower.
Oh, he's masturbating.
And that's OK to talk about, joke about.
Nobody talks about that Pearl.
29:55
Young girl, that's taboo.
No taboo.
Taboo.
Oh, I mean even.
Yeah, even my family caught my cousin and I like show me yours, You know the the game, when we were super young, we were like four or something.
And instead of talking about it with us, they swept it under the rug and then brought it up later by humiliating us like a family gathering.
30:18
But I remember my cousin made it a joke, and my cousin and I were pretty like we were, Both of us were like, dude, we were four, we were four, like, and we looked at each other and we're just like, we we were four, you guys.
And we're not going to talk about this as adults.
30:36
Let's not talk.
About it at all?
Yeah, exactly.
It's shut the conversation down, for sure.
Definitely stop the conversation.
But a lot of people don't have that skill set to be able to even speak up when humiliation is coming their way from their family.
30:51
The shame and the guilt.
Yeah, the shame and the guilt and that kid stored in our bodies.
And then it's wrapped around our sexuality in some way.
And now we can't ask our fucking wife to play with our butt hole because I'm shameful because what I did when I was 4.
Exactly.
31:08
Isn't it just sad?
But it's so true.
It's just when you really think about it like that, everybody has.
When you simplify it the way.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's.
It's a bunch of those things, yeah.
Yeah.
It's in all of us and that we are animals and sex is a part of it and we really need to quit ignoring it and putting a Band-Aid on it.
31:29
And and I'm glad that there's like podcasts like this and there's there is books out there as well and lots of articles out there and there's people doing my work as well.
I'm not going to say everybody in the sex industry comes with it at the same level that I'm coming in at.
31:47
And as it unfortunately the business isn't regulated.
Yeah.
And doesn't have standards of course.
And even the places that do have regulations and licensing for this like, so we have a companionship license that you can companionship license in, let me see, Colorado and California.
32:09
So there is regulations around that and even even legal prostitution in Nevada that though it's but it needs to be modernized.
It's still stuck in the 70s.
I mean yeah and we're just we're beyond that.
32:25
It's just another like modern day way of pimping.
Honestly in my my opinion how they have the regulations lined up for sure we are looking at decriminalization but that doesn't mean anything in the sense of that not everybody doing my business is coming at it at the same level.
32:43
We're all independently doing it and we're offering independently what offering, right.
So it's going to be a a gamble going going with that.
But I do know a lot of women in my industry that are vibrating at the same vibration that I am and are coming with it at a in a holistic manner and not just looking at the person as you know paycheck and as really trying to help them do their work and be the best version of themselves.
33:14
So, and those are the women my industry that I associate myself with right.
So and there's are others out there calling themselves Shaman Atrix and doing the similar style and they are hosting.
I see these retreats all the time like was it cuddling cunt ellini retreat.
33:33
I was like I want to go.
I want to consider.
All that name.
Yeah, that's amazing.
Teach me.
Exactly.
I know I'm the one on that does the retreats too, and it's such an amazing thing.
Yes, yes, again, like the knowledge is out there, it is harder to find through our interwebs.
33:54
Unfortunately, I'll be a little political for a second, but Donald Trump passed Cesta Fosta in 2018, which which ended up censoring our Internet so horribly that it's for every industry, not just for the sex industry or the adult entertainment industry.
34:13
Every industry is affected by this.
And the reason why how he ended up getting it passed is he said that it would cut back on sex trafficking and human trafficking, but ultimately it pushed sex trafficking and human trafficking into the dark web and even further down into the Internet.
34:31
Now that they it was a mess.
It was a mess when he passed this and it's still going on to today.
So even like today, searching our Internet today doesn't look like the same way you could search it in 2015.
So it's.
Even.
No, it's very little population.
34:51
I feel like understands this, but it's like even searching these kinds of retreats that you're talking about are hard to come by.
Even searching platforms to find a legitimate provider in the sex industry is hard to find.
It's just so it's just so censored that these keywords that used to be able to pull it right up, well, you can't find it.
35:12
So it's like, how do we, how do we get the how do we get our word Spread that sex is important.
Even on my end I have a really simple example of that I had.
I'm on my fourth attempt trying to stay on YouTube, right?
And the last one I got kicked off of YouTube because I linked to.
35:31
A sex coaches who's a therapist.
She's a certified therapist.
I linked to her website and that was it.
They cut me.
They didn't even give me the three warnings that time it was just gone.
And her, the main thing she does is therapy for people.
And she I mean it's.
35:47
Just unbelievable.
I couldn't believe it.
So she doesn't even touch them.
It's only talk.
Therapy.
So then now I just kind of try to avoid putting any link in there because if something is as simple as that can get you kicked off of YouTube, you know, I think that's Oh yeah, I think I got, I got I'm, I'm censored.
36:06
I have such a big mouth and I don't censor myself very well.
And I talk about all the things that people I mean, like what was our first conversation with the first thing I mentioned was religion.
I don't.
And the last year is like politics.
I don't ignore this shit.
I shine a lot of light on it and I'm banned.
36:22
Like, you can't even enter my name into any of these social media sites anymore to pull me up.
That's how hard they banned me.
And I put, I put a beautiful elegant like my so my they also were producer in erotica.
36:40
I made this very, very elegant video of like and the black and white with this very, like, you know, orchestra music in the background of my feet.
And the day of the life of Monday Jones basically is what it was.
And it was just my feet.
And I got banned from YouTube from that and I was like what you guys have.
36:59
I mean, that was actually a pretty artistic video.
Oh, it's just also biased.
You know, it's just, yeah, a. 100% biased.
You know what you see.
That too, like the accounts can do more than the smaller accounts.
Or if they're verified and paying for their their verification, that one too.
37:17
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
Oh yeah.
Some of the things I see on Twitter in the morning when I open and I'm like, whoa, Twitter forum, right in my face.
Yes.
But yeah, they're there.
I know, right?
Saying 150,000 followers or something, you know, like and I'm giggling me and my dog gets banned, gets a sensor.
37:36
It's a little sensitive content button over the top of it.
I get those two and sometimes it's like a picture of one of my book covers or something and I'm like well maybe it's maybe our banter back and forth here is telling showing us and giving us confirmation that yeah they are trying to eliminate this information getting out there.
37:56
They they are pretty yeah.
I mean they're definitely not want the people doing the good work around this and giving education and knowledge and and safe places to go to get the the tools basically resources.
Right.
38:12
Is being shadowed shadow banned on these sites.
They don't want it out there.
They don't want this, this information out there.
They don't want to see us evolve.
And honestly we really need to get in connected with our second chakra if we want to get any sort of alignment to be involved.
38:28
Evolve.
Oh, for sure.
Oh my goodness.
I went down the study of yoga and of course for me, the reason why I was doing yoga was to better my sex life with my partner.
Like I was like you were to partner yoga together and all the breathing and I was like, yeah, we're going to unite our bodies and this is going to be hot.
38:46
Like that was the whole journey where I picked yoga.
And then I think I was on day two of my study in it.
The science of yoga was the class.
The whole class just talked about how yoga was preparing our bodies to unite sexually with others.
And I'm, I'm just laughing because the Western world has turned it into this high intensity workout.
39:08
Totally yes.
It has a lot of touch with the whole purpose of why yoga was even created in union with yourself and your surroundings.
Right.
So crazy.
39:23
What do we is America doing to things?
I mean, things that have been known.
America.
Yeah, I know.
That's my experience mostly.
Yeah, it's it's it's just taking these things that have been around for centuries and just like morphing it into something it's not and then leaving pieces out.
39:40
And it's just it's wild.
When you really look at the history of things, it's wild.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And the pendulum, how it's swing so many different ways.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This is, this has been a great conversation.
39:56
I don't know how long we've already been chatting for.
It's felt like it's gone by really quickly, though.
It has.
It's been so is there anything else that you wanted to talk about that we haven't or mentioned what you do, some work that you do or things that you wanted to touch?
40:14
On Oh yeah.
So I my journey didn't obviously start.
I should say.
I'm really glad that I didn't.
Dive into sex work full time.
40:31
Until my 30s.
I did touch in it in my at 18, so I was how I how I personally got introduced to it, which is very like my story is I feel like feeds into just a conversation that we've just talked about as well.
40:48
I did mainstream modelling and acting and something that I started noticing and I'm 13 when I started that journey.
I'm young, I'm young and I know this that I'm young and my mom and dad would take me to sets and they figured I was in this professional world and that people would take care of me and and I would get dropped off at these sets.
41:12
And every time I I was alone with any of these photographers, they would try to.
Figure out a way for me to get naked or have implied nudes in our photos, even though the photo shoot we were doing was a headshot period so or the photos that we were doing were shoes or something you know, like it was it was it's for an advertisement.
41:35
It's like I'm not doing nudes for you you know my little, you know my my kid brain was just like well that's wrong.
I'll I'll say no.
Of course, I would always say no.
And I'm like, no, I'm not going to do that.
I want an actual business in this.
I want to have a life in this kind of world, this production world, and be into my adulthood as well as like I'm thinking longevity at 13 already and and I think it was I was 18 and the photographer and I went to this job.
42:09
So I'm like, I'm getting basically pedophiles, right, Pedophiles trying to take advantage of me in the production world, which we already know how much exposure in Hollywood there's been in the United States around the shit.
And yeah, and it's still like I started during the day and age where it was film cameras, it wasn't digital yet.
42:28
So at 18 I go to set and I'm taking photos and it was it was like.
Pajamas and robes.
So it was like nightwear, but it wasn't 90s or lingerie.
But then he he asked me if I would do the the lingerie and I got, well that wasn't on work form.
42:49
I go, so we need to do what's on the work form, you know, with my agent.
And then he's like, well, I'll give you this much money and I'm sitting there going, well, I am 18.
So I made a deal and I thought it was so.
I thought it was so smart.
That was so clever.
So I made him this deal.
And I said at this time like $350.00 is a lot for an 18 year old kid in the 90s.
43:10
So I said I want $350.00 and you I get all the what is it?
The.
I get the not the Prince.
I get the the negatives, the negative.
Yep, Yep.
So he Yep.
So I got $350.00.
43:26
I came back, got the negatives.
After he developed it, I walked away.
And that was like, my first introduction to, like, soft.
I mean, it was a soft introduction to, like, sex work for sure, but it was an introduction to it.
43:44
And I'm just glad that I waited until my 30s to fully embrace it, because I did need to go through a lot of, like, my 20s.
And I didn't.
I basically did nursing all the way through my 20s and into my early 30s.
So that's some background Western medicine, which my parents were horrified by because I was raised with Eastern medicine and I just like, was adamant that they both could live together.
44:07
There is a way for them to live together.
Yeah, I think there.
I think there is.
Personally.
I mean, I'm actually a nurse myself.
I worked as a nurse for many years.
All right then.
Yeah, I think there is too.
After I think. 15 or 18 years of nursing and I definitely feel like they can be married very well.
44:24
I think they can be.
Yeah, I'm not sure what else to share about myself.
I feel like I ran out of things to say.
Well, I think it's amazing what you do and you know when you when you are doing the things you know to help the individuals, does that give you a sense of, you know, do you feel satisfaction?
44:47
What are the things you feel when you know you're impacting someone that is going to impact their entire lives?
Like what are some of the thoughts or emotions you have when you're dealing with that type of situation?
Yeah, well, first let me insert that the sex work that I do is like, it's a very wide spectrum of it.
45:06
And I do have.
I have education and certificates and.
And licensing behind like a lot of them, like I wanted to start offering talk therapy as one of them and like coaching.
So of course I went and got myself certified so that I can do this.
So I had, I had tools to be able to offer it really.
45:24
And do it with some confidence behind it.
Yeah.
So, like, that's where my base starts right there is like just being a lifestyle coach and a counselor, an alternative counselor.
And giving you a place to even have these tough conversations that you're not able to even have around your sexuality.
45:41
Figuring out your own personal sexuality, sexual trauma, and around, like how to interact with your partner.
You know, like a safe place to have the conversations.
And without judgement because of the whole span of what I do, right.
45:57
So that goes from right there to cuddling.
And a lot of, like my cuddling people are PTS.
The people that are just needing to have touchback integrated back in and then I do a somatic body work that has a tantric element to it as well.
46:13
And then I move into the other sides of things and the taboo sides of things and kink and BDSNI.
Only at this current time in my life, I'm only offering professional dominance.
There has been periods where I've done both, just to have an understanding about what's going on for my clients.
46:33
Basically I need to know what did it feel like to get hit because I'm about to go in and hit them.
The things that you know, people think of BDSM as this crazy super taboo space and culture and I want to just clear up something around that, that there is also a very large spectrum inside of that culture.
46:53
I will state the culture still falls under a patriarchal system with it being about, I want to say 90% dominance and the community is still male and it's a very little percentage of females that classify themselves as dominance.
47:13
But there still is that, that mirroring the fact right of mainstream culture to this BDE and this King culture, it's still a mirrors.
And it's not free of that And something else I've noticed too is the polyamory community is also still follow falls under that patriarchal language too.
47:31
Like this is my primary and this is my secondary and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.
I'm not going to go down the jargon like, but still I'm like wait, why?
Like, if we're doing this, such as alternative and unorthodox and untraditional way of life, why are we still mirroring the same system that's been shown to us through the mainstream?
47:50
That's very true.
Very true.
Yeah.
Because it's so flu.
Just like, I feel like a lot of younger children today, like the young ones that I'm working with around like finding their sexuality, which that's also a really large glossary, by the way.
I don't think that people understand.
Yes.
48:07
And just like there's so many things that you can classify as an or like a sexual orientation, so which I think is beautiful.
That we have all these labels, but I also, I also know like really to get to know somebody, you have to unlabel them to to really see them and know them.
48:24
But it is wonderful that we can have these words now.
And I think it's great that the younger generation is using that around their genders.
They are, yes.
So it's very different than it's been for many, many years.
Yeah.
So that's.
Very, very new, I know.
And yes, people are totally fighting it.
48:42
And I I think I mean, I even felt like when it was first explained to me being a writer, I fought it too, 'cause I was like, oh, this isn't the grammar I learned, Wait, wait, I'm totally confused.
And then I was like, as soon as my, my, my youngest child explains it to me, I was like, oh wait, that still even follows under the grammar.
48:59
I used my just my trained brain from our mainstream culture.
Pop culture has trained it this way, yes.
We are unfortunately molded by that.
And it's hard to, to, you know, switch that up and break it and reform that as well, you know, But but you can do.
49:15
Habits, habits can die hard.
Yeah, they do.
They can.
And that's, you know, we can retrain, we can reset our nervous system, all the things that we've been talking about.
But I do think it's great.
The younger generation is changing the is changing the culture and changing the language and evolving it, which is what we need.
49:38
It is what we.
Need.
Yeah, we need it.
That's the only way we're going to be able to evolve as a species on a collective level.
And we still have, We're still going to have resistance.
Like, yeah, the censorship we have on our Internet, alcohol still being legal, the whole other thing.
49:57
I think it's the one of the worst drugs that we've ever have have made.
Socially acceptable One up, I said.
Just one up, One up right.
Oh, I get it.
One of those people that are super sensitive, I get a little tipsy off of just like Kombucha.
50:15
I can't even imagine.
Like, I look at people in restaurants or like at tables, like in social gatherings.
I'm like, Oh my God, you're just poisoning yourself.
Stop it.
But that's my own personal thing around that one, I feel like.
I feel like cigarettes should be illegal too.
50:34
Taken off nicotine.
I shouldn't say just cigarettes nicotine because the E cigarettes are just as bad.
Oh yeah, yeah, they are.
Those are two substances that that we make socially acceptable and I feel like are two of the worst, the hardest ones to break, the worst ones to watch people die from and just suffer through addictions with.
50:57
Well, yeah.
And you know, it's probably really driven a lot, you know, by companies and money and you know.
Companies money suppressing, suppressing ourselves, right?
Yeah, Yeah, turning to that, instead of a different way to deal with stress, perhaps, you know.
51:15
Anxiety.
What better if you just went and masturbated so that you know.
Like, yes, right, Go get a dopamine fixed from an orgasm.
Get some serotonin maybe, Like instead of eating a donut for breakfast, like, add some greens, you know?
Yeah, so, but I mean, we've made it acceptable that way too.
51:35
We've and we've killed our indigenous people along the way with it.
So that carry a lot of, I feel like also carry a lot of this kind of work that there's passing on the kind of work that I'm talking about.
I remember talking with someone, which was totally fascinating to me with somebody I interviewed and they were talking about how in those people that the the sexuality there was like a certain number of genders.
51:58
Was it like, I don't know, maybe you know about this five genders or I don't know what it was?
Oh, so yeah, I mean, I can talk to you a little bit about gender.
So yeah, like in the like.
Native American tribe days you're talking about they are in their culture they have yes they have multiple genders and a lot of like 2 spirits is what they call the ones that you know that we would call trams these days and bisexual.
52:27
They have a couple.
I can't remember all the names myself.
I was I even have a native blood.
My I was raised during the time that it was taboo to be red skin.
So and it was also we had to mix in with the white people.
So yeah, so my parents never really.
52:42
My parents never registered as kids, even though we plan to go get registered because there is great benefits in being registered with the tribe, and it also gives me access to go back to my roots.
Oh, OK, sure.
But, but what I've found out about gender, just maybe in the last year and a half, is that we have 26 different DNA strands that actually make up.
53:09
Our gender but we only have three genitals that present but but that third one doesn't get present.
The intersex doesn't get presented.
I think it's intersex or where they present to a vagina and a penis.
What is that called?
I can't remember the technical name for it at the moment but we have but higher percentage.
53:30
We only have two genitals that present these 26 trans.
So of course we're going to fall under a spectrum in that spectrum in our sexuality and then our gender, gender preference, right somewhere on that spectrum of 26 strands of DNA, different DNA strands.
53:47
So we're going to land anywhere on that, on that number scale and nobody talks about that and I found.
I found that information out from a sexual like a RN that was a sexual like that was her specialty was sexuality and gender studies.
54:07
And then when like when she explained it, I was like, Oh my gosh, no wonder why I've had so many issues like just me personally.
Like no wonder why I've had so many.
My DNA strand probably lands somewhere towards more the middle and I've had so many issues with with reproductive organs.
54:26
And I've even dated men that I think that are somewhere towards the middle because they've also have been like born sterile and have other cues that like they're like they're have way more feminine energy than a masculine energy.
Yeah.
So, but yeah, we don't talk about that.
54:44
We just talk, yeah, we just talk about a penis and a vagina and then and then we go through these, but then.
That people who are dealing with gender dysmorphia go through these major surgeries to to get there without a lot of knowledge being explained to them why they're even feeling the way they're feeling, right.
55:04
Maybe so.
Like gender dysmorphia is a whole nother conversation, but it is real.
That's really mind blowing all the possibilities within that.
I mean because they have all the different combinations and.
Combinations that 20.
55:19
Those 26 strands can make and also to help people feel like OK this this is really who I am.
This is like down to my DNA.
This is not, you know, people think, oh, you just feel that way because you experienced this or you had this in your.
Life, right?
No, I am, You know, I'm.
55:36
Actually wired made-up this way inside integral.
This is integral to who I am.
That's a good word.
Yeah, that's crazy.
That's finally the person I was talking to.
They were talking about how people there was actually.
They thought it was an amazing thing or they they paid homage to someone who was able to interact with different sexualities, different orientations, different genders, whatever you want to say, all those different things.
56:02
And so that was like, seen as something that was awesome, like that.
That was like in esteem in in our country, it's taboo.
You're horrible.
You're a monster.
A monster.
Keep that in the closet.
Don't talk about it.
There's a lot of shame when we'll come up with the shame and guilt judgment put on us.
56:20
Contrast is just staggering.
When you think about that, it's like 180.
It's opposite of what things used to be.
And that's just crazy.
That's that's mind blowing, really, when you think about all that stuff.
Yep, it is.
And I would, Yeah, like I said at the beginning of the conversation too, I'd like to see the pendulum swing back over.
56:39
Yeah, absolutely.
Bring in some new modern day, modern day around this and get the get the information out there that to the people who need it.
And we have a large population that is suppressed sexually for sure.
And yeah and then detach from it too.
56:58
I I don't I don't want to talk about my 22 year old because like they're not in here.
But I also I also have something funny to say about it.
Like even her like.
I remember when she was younger.
She's like, EW, gross.
Don't talk to me about that stuff.
Oh yeah, You're cheeky and disgusting.
And then, you know, she, you know, she becomes of age.
57:17
Like, I think it was like she turns 19 or something.
And she's like, so mom, I I hear you do fetish wrestling.
Like, so how'd you, how'd you get in that business?
And I like, I thought you and I said to her, like, thought you thought you thought of me as disgusting and gross and my kink was horrible.
57:35
And she's like.
No, I just am trying to own my own.
That's what I thought, and it's a good stuff I.
Figured it was a production, you know, projection of her own stuff that she was trying to go through, 'cause I was like, I've never said once that my kink is disgusting.
57:53
I pretty much have owned it, like, so this must be you working through some stuff.
Yeah, most likely.
Yeah, yeah.
Do you write under Monday Jones or do you write under a pen name?
I write under Monday Jones.
58:09
I write a dating blog.
It's about my dating life.
But something as a dating mistress.
It's called a dating mistress.
And yeah, so I write that blog, and it's mostly about my dating life, but sprinkles of life lessons that I've learned along the way, OK?
58:29
In a lot of ground like my spirituality too and just belief systems and things like that.
And I don't ignore you know like the things old topics that we talked about.
I don't ignore any of them in my blog in that blog either.
And then I sprinkle in fun little stories about my life and dating stories and you know the the ups and downs that dating go through the you know I'm not a fan of NRE, the new relationship energy.
58:54
But I talk a little bit about that and I talk about like dating apps that I've used and.
Like little stories of lessons that I've learned around dating, My erotica is written.
I've just started it.
I've always wanted to do it, but I didn't know, you know, because I feel like I don't want to just rewrite all the kinky stories that I've done, even though I do.
59:15
I would like to do that as well.
But I feel like that should be like my.
My biography or My Autobiography or whatever, Yeah, not like where my creative mind goes.
So I've only have a couple that I've written on a membership site and and it's my own personal membership site.
59:35
But I write where you can't.
But the way that I write is you can't tell what the gender is.
OK, gotcha.
So it's always the day.
Then there's like it's never you can't tell if it's female or male or trans.
And I've been really liking that because it's making, it's challenging me in writing.
59:53
Oh, that would be challenging.
Yeah, Because we fall back on our what we've.
Yeah, What?
We've grown up with them, yes.
And even just even describing the bodies, I'm having to use different words besides Dick, cock, vagina, like I'm like, oh gosh, okay, what's another sexy word?
1:00:14
But you can tell that I'm grabbing their the genitals are being grabbed.
Right.
You know that That makes me think of one time.
We were talking.
I was talking with somebody.
We were talking about the word Volvo.
I'm like, that's just really not a sexy word.
It's kind of an ugly word, you know?
It's an ugly word.
I have to say, it's ugly.
1:00:31
Ugly.
Yeah.
I mean, like, how can I eroticize Bulba?
So yeah, yeah, so that's giving me a fun challenge, writing that that erotic pub.
But it's still, it's still a really new new Ave. for me.
It's fine, I know.
1:00:47
I know some people like to stick to a niche, but I'm kind of like all over the place.
That's just yes.
And I feel, yeah, you're a very dimensional person.
So I could see why it would you would want to have different dimensions of you in this craft.
1:01:04
Yeah.
So and I feel you on that like even when I started doing sex work, I was like, I can't just do one.
I have to have full gamut because I basically it's call myself a sex therapist to simplify it for people because it's just such a gamut of what I'm bringing to the table.
1:01:20
So and me beating you know me beating people with a flogger and a BDSM scene is really equivalent to like have you ever gone to like those Russian bath houses where they hit you know they they strike each other with those like the big bamboos.
They're not bamboo sticks but the big like I can't remember the name of the leaves that they use but they hit you with the back with your leaves.
1:01:39
I've.
Never been to them, but I've heard of that, Yeah.
But I mean, it's like almost the same equivalent to what I'm doing to somebody's body as they're getting done at that bath house.
It's like I'm bringing like not.
It's like, it's not a really heavy not being a sadistic human at the moment.
1:01:55
I'm like, just really bringing some blood to the top of their skin, right?
It's a physical thing.
It's sensation.
Exactly.
It's a sensation.
The body part of the somatics.
Yeah.
I would like to think of this podcast with this.
1:02:11
This episode was really helpful for people and encourage them to continue to explore through their own personal sexuality and genders and and overcoming those hurdles and realizing that it's not.
1:02:28
We absorb a lot of our surroundings and sometimes I feel like humans can like when we're being so self judged, like self self shaming and self guilting and that self judgement.
I sometimes wonder if it's really ourselves that are speaking to ourselves that way, or if it's the outside environment and that we're soaking it up as the sensitive humans that we are like the sponges that we are and then we internalize it as our own.
1:02:59
I think our culture puts presets into our heads, and sometimes we aren't aware of them, we don't acknowledge them.
Sometimes we're just totally blind to them and we just fall victim.
In other words, yeah, we're trained like we were saying at the beginning, just trained to this one way.
1:03:18
And then we get caught in that that loop that it's our fault or, you know, comes back on us.
I shouldn't say our fault, but in that loop of the self part.
And then we don't realize, wait, no, it is OK to have sex this way.
There is not anything wrong about wanting to an example.
1:03:35
Get my Dick rubbed by feet.
There's nothing wrong with it.
It's just that's what I want to do.
Feet look hot on my Dick.
I want to think that's it.
That's all it is.
It's as simple as that.
I have to say the funniest thing.
1:03:50
One of the funniest reviews I've gotten from my book so far is a woman who got to chapter 12.
And she is so turned off by foot fetish.
And I don't even go that far into foot fetish, right.
One of the men, one of the daddies have a has a foot fetish.
She's like, I can't read anymore.
And she stopped reading.
1:04:06
I'm like, Oh my God, oh, you're like, that was only just a second.
Like it wouldn't.
Like in reality that only was like 3 minutes of the scene, OK?
If you're that triggered by my book on that topic, OK, then you could then don't don't finish.
And that's totally fine.
1:04:22
Totally fine, but was disgusted I finished.
It's on the top ten of fetishes, so it is apparently a thing.
OK, it's right up there with tits and butts, feet and legs.
I have to share one thing I found out really, really extremely kind of blew my mind.
1:04:38
I was talking with somebody who was a medical professional and they said that there has actually been scientific evidence for people who have foot fetishes, that those parts of the brain are somehow near the genital regulations.
So it's actually could be physiological.
1:04:56
Why they have a foot fetish and that just my brain.
So as we were talking about earlier, it's like the whole thing, like the way their their brain is actually built is what actually?
Gives them the foot fetish.
And and it may be that they were exposed to feet, but if they have this particular setup in their brain and then they see feet and Bing, it's like all the all the things align and all of a sudden BAM, they got a foot fetish.
1:05:18
You know, like, yeah, yeah.
So that's my mind.
Well, I mean, it's real.
I'm wondering if I have AI also have a foot thing.
It's not.
It's about me getting like the foot rubs and me getting the treatment for the feet.
But there's also like there's a thing wrapped up with like shoes with it too.
1:05:37
Shoes and feet and legs, shoes, feet, legs, things that go on the legs and the feet and the.
Yeah.
So I don't know, it's it's totally as a thing.
Never really thought it was a thing until I think a like college boyfriend coined it out and I was like.
Oh, is that what that is?
1:05:54
I just really liked nice shoes and then I wanted to show them off in my feet.
I wasn't a good model.
One point that's.
Right, exactly.
Maybe that was your your connection there.
That was my gateway.
Exactly, but gateway to foot fetish was a foot being a a shoe model.
1:06:12
We all have our story, and some are more interesting than others.
That's pretty interesting.
My true.
I also, like my family, used to make fun of my feet all the time growing up because they were just so, so long and lengthy and kind of my body was like they were always out of, out of proportion with my body.
1:06:29
OK.
And then I remember like the I sold the foot video for quite a bit of money and I remember looking thing and be like my family knew.
Yes.
Oh, I bet I know my feet are the I knew how much money, right?
But it's kind of like, yeah, you're like, OK, so quit making fun of my feet.
1:06:47
Because look at what I did with my feet.
Look what I just did with it.
Yep.
Absolutely.
Oh, this has been so amazing.
I could keep talking to me.
We'll have to have your back on again and we can go into that stuff.
We didn't get to into that other, yes.
And I would love juicy things with the stories and not so much of the the political, the political part of the world.
1:07:09
Yeah.
And maybe that's just where my mind has been, especially after a visit to Nevada recently and finding just seeing how, Yeah, just seeing how far behind we really are and and just how much further we have to go.
1:07:25
And also being in the industry as long as I have like tipping you know doing I did we'll call it moonlighting work in my 20s.
But like, even just seeing how far that came to where it is now, it's just phenomenal even how the development of porn too.
1:07:42
Oh, now you used to have to have an agency from porn, but now you anybody can do it on these only fan sites or sites like only fan and everybody's a porn star all of a sudden and and and even like put me at a halt with my production company.
1:07:58
I was like, wow, what's the point of me even doing production company if like everybody can just do it independently.
But then I was like, wait, wait, wait, no, that's my art.
That's my own personal passion.
That's why I have a production company, is because this is an expression of my sexuality, and this is an expression of my Eroticism.
1:08:16
And really, the reason why I started it is because I wasn't seeing porn out there that I wanted to watch.
I was like, fuck this.
I'm going to make my own.
Yes, and mine is not anything like the mainstream at all.
It's not even male female porn.
1:08:33
A lot of it.
I think and we need, we need all the different ones out there.
I mean, we just do.
I agree, yeah, 'cause if we're just, again, if we're shown this male, female, then we're conditioned to this male, female and this little boy that got exposed to 13 to porn or even younger these days only sees this one way.
1:08:49
However, I will say that porn sites do have interesting categories and parents out there maybe maybe should put some parental locks on your phone.
Some some kids shouldn't be exposed to some of the things.
I know, right?
That's great.
So young.
This is why I'm probably dealing with the Ed with like 20 something year old boys, right?
1:09:09
Because they saw, right?
Because they saw these hardcore things and then they went out into the real world and had sex and they realized, why aren't you the porn star that I've been drifting off to for eight years?
Like, why aren't you doing those things that she does, right?
1:09:25
Hey, yo, that was a job.
It.
Is and an entertainment girl.
We could maybe learn something from it, but still is entertainment payment, not education.
Not that you can learn something, You can learn stuff.
But yes, you're.
1:09:41
I like that.
That was a good insert right there.
Yes, you can learn something from it, but it's the source of how we learn how to Make Love.
Yes.
Oh gosh, yeah.
Well, it's just been so awesome.
Well, I will definitely contact you again in the future and we can do another another chat and thank you so much some of those the juicier, juicier sexy stories.
1:10:00
Absolutely.
I'm in.
I'm in.
I'm in too.
Thank you you.
Have an amazing day.
Bye, bye, bye.
OK, thank you for listening to that.
I hope you really enjoyed it.
It was a great conversation.
I really enjoyed it.
1:10:16
She was really fun.
She has so many different experiences, so many varied experiences, very much a renaissance woman like she said and so oh, it's so amazing.
So check it out online, all of her links find out more information about her.
In my books again, my new audiobook that just came out by Lacey Cross sharing his adventurous wife, First time wife Shirt Itty Bitty Vixen is now just released.
1:10:40
Todd off the press yesterday, so get that audiobook.
It is very sexy.
It's a hot wife story written by Lacey Cross and I narrate it and in my hands audio is a male character.
It was super fun.
Check out down in the podcast Show notes for all the links to my books and audiobooks and don't forget to use those codes.
1:10:59
For getting manscaped products 20% off Ruin Willow 20 plus free shipping and kiru sex toys Ruin Willow 10.
OK don't forget to enjoy your bodies.
Enjoy your bodies baby.
You're giving them for a reason.
You're giving these organs for a reason to enjoy your body.
1:11:16
Get stress relief pleasure baby.
Get yourself some pleasure every day.
Make sure you come today every day.
Yeah, every day.
Whether you do it alone with a partner or partners, enjoy your body, enjoy your life and enjoy your pleasure.
1:11:35
It is not a bad thing.
We were given these organs to enjoy, not to ignore.
Not to say oh Nope, I shouldn't do that.
That's like saying don't use your taste buds.
You were given taste buds, but don't use them.
Don't use them for chocolate, but you can use them for vegetables.
That's bullshit.
1:11:51
That's.
Really ridiculous if you think about it, isn't it right?
You can't use your taste buds.
You were given these taste buds, but you're not supposed to use them.
You're not supposed to taste all the foods, The bad foods you're not supposed to taste.
Who says what's the bad food anyways?
Don't listen to that.
PS.
Enjoy your body today.
Make sure you come today, OK?
1:12:07
Off my soapbox and goodbye.
Have a good fucking day.
Love you.
Bye.
Bye now.
1:12:26
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